| |
| |
|
Relationships Information |
|
|
|
Is Your Negative Thinking Scaring Off Your Soul Mates?
Francine Bonnecelli* swore off relationships the day her husband of nine years left her for a twenty-something barmaid in San Francisco. Even though this was her third marriage, she felt three was the charm and, after all, he showed all the qualities in a soul mate and a marriage partner that no one had ever shown her. After this traumatic experience, she closed off her heart to future relationships, giving up on the theory that you can find THE ONE who meets all your goals and expectations. Jennifer Quigley*, fresh out of college, had enough of her share of "flings" and was ready for that someone special to enter her life. However, after every date ended up in the bedroom, she vowed that she was going to give up dating altogether. "It's just not worth it," she said. "There just are no more good guys left. I'd rather stay home with my cat or go out with friends." Joseph Freemont* married his childhood sweetheart fresh out of high school. After graduation, they married and one and a half years later, became the proud parents of a strapping baby boy they named Michael. Two years later, another child joined their family and then a year later, the third child was born. Joseph was a good father as well as a good husband, delighting his wife with anything her heart desired. He laughed at his good luck and never took advantage of the situation by treating every day with his family as if it were the first. Twenty years to the day they married, Joseph lost his wife to terminal cancer. He grieved to the point where he could not come to grips with her passing and decided from that day forward he would never look at another woman again. What do these three people have in common? They have all given up on looking for their soul mates altogether and have closed off that path of their journey which is necessary for total self-growth and finding their higher selves. While they have entered a comfort zone inside themselves to ward off the pain, they have closed it to whatever soul mates who might enter their lives in the future. When they put up this shield, they have also cut off a very necessary part of their life's journey. And why is this bad? The reason is that, unknowingly, they have severed an important and vital part of their well-being. They have retreated within themselves to the point where finding love has no meaning anymore. And, in so doing, they have opened themselves to the prospects of getting stress-related diseases and losing what zest they have left in their lives. In the case of Joseph, grieving is a natural process and one that should be completed before he even thinks about carrying on another relationship. If he were to jump right into a relationship, without going through the entire healing process, only disastrous results would occur. However, in time, Joseph will heal and he will start to feel those old feelings of having someone to share his life with. Whether he acts on these impulses, it all depends on whether he is comfortable within himself to do so. This will take a lot of time for Joseph to come to this point, but he has to realize that shielding himself from his other soul mates is not going to help him heal. By allowing these soul mates to enter his life, he will realize for what reason his deceased wife came into his life and left so abruptly. It's all a learning process and one in which Joseph needs to enter in order for him to release the negativity he is bestowing on himself in the name of grief. Francine and Jennifer are merely products of bad relationships. Both figure what's the point? Until they release this negative thinking, they will bring this baggage into whatever future relationships that may be in stow for them and it will be a pattern they will continue until they realize that this negative thinking is what is preventing them from finding their true soul mates and finding the happiness they are looking for. Baggage from past relationships shouldn't hinder you from giving up on finding your soul mate. Once you understand that they all served purposes towards your self-growth - even the bad ones - and you can work through the karma associated with it, you're that much closer to finding your higher self. It's your higher self where you find the life, the creativity and the love you deserve. *names have been changed About Dorothy Thompson Author and soul mate expert Dorothy Thompson is one of the nation's leading authority on soul mates. Her book "Romancing the Soul" and ebook "How to Find and Keep Your Soul Mate" are one of the most comprehensive guides to explaining what soul mates are really all about. Dorothy's relationship columns have appeared in publications in the U.S. and abroad and has been quoted in such books as "Mean Girls Grown Up: Adulte Women Who Are Still Queen Bees, Middle Bees, and Afraid-to-Bees" by Cheryl Dellasega. She is a popular radio media guest, appearing on such shows and Lifetime Radio, Around2It, and Cuzin Eddie Show with Penny Sansevieri and will appear on Single Talk (World Talk Radio) and 850 KOA-AM (Clear Channel Radio with listeners in 38 states, Canada and Mexico)in September 2005. To learn more about books and upcoming interviews from Dorothy Thompson and to receive a FREE newsletter on how to find and keep your soul mate, please go to http://www.dorothythompson.net ©Dorothy Thompson, Author and Relationship Expert - http://www.dorothythompson.net
MORE RESOURCES:
Jamie Kennedy Talks Relationships, Valentine's Day Plans and Playing 'Cupid ... - Hollywood Reporter
Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
What Is Love And The Love Equation What is Love? This question has bothered me for a long time. After listening to many perspectives and examining Love from several angles, the thought came to my mind that we have over-complicated Love and need easier to understand models. Womens Cosmic Personality Quiz: Are You a Star Woman or an Earth Mother? Star Women are visionary leaders, and focused on the future. Earth Mothers are focused on nurturing, caring, and giving. Sound Seduction Advice for Dating and Romance Success BackgroundSeduction is a subtle tool used with the ultimate goal in mind of attracting and having sex with a chosen partner. Seduction is a form of flirting, but is more ambitious in its means, fulfilling our desire for sex and companionship. Breaking Your Relationship Pattern, Part 2 The first step toward being able to attract and create your ideal relationship is to clear the way for it by eliminating baggage from your past. This baggage refers to any resentments, hurts, or fears you have toward anyone who either was a role model or who participated directly in a relationship with you. The Counsel of Caution Caution is a word with a fine old-fashioned ring. The dictionary definition I have in front of me reads: "attention to safety, prudence, carefulness". Making Passion More Passionate Somewhere between the first kiss and growing old together, many couples experience dormant growth phases during their relationship, leaving one, if not both partners with a need for greater input, emotionally and/or physically.The process of emotional growth is both independent, and uncomfortable. Relationships Technology The notion that there can be a technology of relationships basically contradicts what we all know aboout relationships. There are entire bookshelves about relationships. Relationship Conflict: 5 Deadly Mistakes and What to Do Instead While conflict in marriage is inevitable, fighting is optional.The secret is in how you approach and handle the conflict. Second Time Around the Block Divorce happens. I'm not going to debate the causes or the moral and ethical implications of that here. How to Find Relationship Advice One thing to keep in mind when seeking relationship advice is that the relationship advice business is exactly that - a business, and a big business at that. It is important to be aware that there is a lot of bad advice available in the marketplace, a lot of poorly trained relationship counselors around, and a lot of poorly conceived and badly written books on the subject. How to Survive Long Distance Relationships One of the great obstacles to maintaining a healthy relationship these days occurs when jobs or other situations put physical distance between the two partners. This ultimately leads to what is called a long distance relationship that neither party may have been prepared for in the beginning. Adultery as Sexual Addiction: Should You Stay Married? I outline 7 kinds of affairs in my E-book, "Break Free From the Affair." One affair, "I Can't Say NO!" is characterized by addictive tendencies. Is The Internet A Miracle Cure For Loneliness? A few years ago a surprising survey discovered that people who spent a lot of time on the Internet were a lot lonelier than people who didn't spend much time on the Net.This was an unexpected find because many people view the Internet and e-mail as a great way to make and keep connections with other people. Relationship Advice: How to Ignore Your Spouse or Partner Marriage can be one of the quickest and most effective paths to taking someone special for granted.We don't mean to do it. Relationship Advice: Grieving Before Going On Q. I got married for the first time when I was 20, and it lasted less than two years when my wife left me for another guy. Couples - Learn to Work Together to Solve Problems Q. There has to be some way around the continuing battle in our marriage. ARC of Understanding In relationship we all make mistakes and sometimes we are insensitive to the needs of others, especially those very close to us All this leads to disappointments and resentments. The answer to handling disappointments is understanding. Why We Chose The Person We Love "Those who do not remember the past are condemned to repeat it." -- George Santayana"Why do I always wind up with the wrong person? I want someone who is kind, loving, reliable and open. Conflict In Faith Direct Answers - Column for the week of July 19, 2004My husband is Jewish, and I am Catholic. That wasn't a problem when we were dating, because he isn't religious. How to Handle a Cheating Partner Most people do not understand the nature of cheating within a relationship. Let's begin by taking a look at that before going any further.
|
| home | site map |
| © 2010 |
