Relationships Tips

Relationship Advice: Wash that (Bad) Man Out of Your Hair


Stuck on a guy who cheats on you? Lies? Claims he loves you but can't marry you because a) his wife won't divorce him, b) his last relationship ended so painfully it nearly killed him, or c) he can't make a commitment until his kids are in college?

Here's how to get unstuck:

1) Understand that you have no control over the situation. You can't make a man love you the way you deserve to be loved, you can't keep him faithful, you can't force him to tell the truth. If he's not willing, forget it.

2) Let go. Don't call a man who causes you pain. Don't go looking for him (in other words, stop picking at the pimple). If Aunt Polly asks what happened to that lovely fellow you brought to Cousin Elmer's wedding, tell her he died.

3) Close your heart. Sure, your blood pounds whenever the guy walks into the room, but you can change this. Definitely. Write a list of the things you don't like about him (be honest; there are a couple!). Refer to this list whenever you're tempted to fantasize about him, or worse, contact him. Bring to mind the times he made you feel bad about yourself in 3-dimensional detail.

Your goal is to become indifferent. In other words, you want to get to the point where you'd rather shop for socks than hang out with the guy.

4) Write a list of all things you have going for you: Sense of humor? Compassion? Resourcefulness? Remember every compliment you've ever gotten. Write them down. Whip 'em out whenever you start mooning over What's-His-Name. Know that you're an excellent catch.

5) Take care of yourself. Speak to yourself as you would a beloved child. Wear clothes that honor your body. Eat foods that nourish you. Avoid convenience foods that damage your health and your looks. Buy yourself flowers.

The antidote to being stuck on a bad man is to learn to love yourself enough to stop being attracted to him. The bonus? After a while, you'll start attracting (and being attracted to!) men who really know how to love a woman.

Go for it.

Terry Hernon MacDonald gave up dating losers, schmoozers, and No-Show Joes 16 years ago. She is the author of "How to Attract and Marry the Man of Your Dreams." Visit her website at http://www.marrysmart.com. Check out her blog, http://happygirlmusing.blogspot.com. Tune in to her radio show, Romance Talk with Terry, at 11PM/PST Fridays on http://healthylife.net.


MORE RESOURCES:

Relationships, communication theme of Friday's Warner Robins council retreat
Macon Telegraph (blog)
After ending at 7 pm Friday, the retreat will continue Saturday from 8 am to 3:30 pm OV Brantley, a former attorney for Fulton County governmental bodies, told council members their internal relationships are important to strong operations and images.

and more »


CBC.ca

Depression Linked To Adolescent Bullying
Medical News Today
"Often the assumption is that problematic peer relationships drive depression. We found that depression symptoms predicted negative peer relationships. We examined the issue from both directions but found no evidence to suggest that peer relationships ...
Depressed Adolescents More Likely to be BulliedPsychCentral.com
Depressed adolescents likelier to be bulliedTimes of India
Depressed adolescents more likely to be targets of bullying: StudyHealthJockey.com
U.S. News & World Report -Expatriate Healthcare
all 46 news articles »


Cara Dorris '15: The fiction of relationship?
The Brown Daily Herald
Most people will tell you that there are two types of relationships at Brown: rigid, Facebook-official romances and hurried, efficient and occasionally chronic hookups. Though there are exceptions, most of us brag that we're too busy, even too selfish ...

and more »


PsychCentral.com

Optimal conversation lowers stress in relationships
Times of India
Young couples who easily engage in rewarding conversations with their partners, experience less relationship stress and higher satisfaction, say researchers. According to research from Kansas State University, young adults who have optimal conversation ...
Going With the Flow of Talk Brings Couples CloserPsychCentral.com

all 12 news articles »


Healthy relationship examples crucial for youth, experts say
Maxwell Gunter Dispatch
In the race to stop domestic violence, educating children before they date can provide the awareness for healthy relationships when they become adults. In the crucial years before youth start dating, parents and peers impact children's perceptions of ...

and more »


Relationships Art Exhibit at the SCAHC Gallery in Sussex
NorthJersey.com (press release)
In the Relationships Art Exhibit, the Sussex County Arts and Heritage Council is asking artists to explore, well, relationships—any relationship. And what seems to be a traditional subject for art can prove to have numerous possibilities when viewed ...

and more »


Jamie Kennedy Talks Relationships, Valentine's Day Plans and Playing 'Cupid ...
Hollywood Reporter
As for his research of the role, the actor joked, "I went to Zales," before admitting, "I think I've been in enough relationships that that was my research." Not that he claims to know what he's doing. "Being in all of my relationships, I'm even more ...

and more »


At NRC Hearing, Signs Of Improving Relationships
Fox Business
However, it offered several hints that personal relationships on the five-member commission may be improving less than two months after they boiled over at a pair of congressional hearings. The tensions have raised questions about the nuclear safety ...

and more »


Love Triangles: And Kitty Makes Three
Patch.com
When pets and relationships collide, there are better answers than dumping one of the feuding parties. This shorthair cat is available for adoption from the Santa Monica Animal Shelter. For more information, contact Sharon Hardy, owner of Sweet Potato ...

and more »


HipHopDX

The Dead End Theory: 15 Rapper Relationships That Ended In Break-Up
HipHopDX
by DX Staff From Eminem and Mariah Carey's bittersweet triste to Darlene's immortal gangsterism, and the Kelis and Nas shakedown, HipHopDX looks back at some high-profile Rap relationships. While Love and Hip Hop is currently a hit reality show, ...

and more »

Google News

home | site map
© 2010