Relationships Tips

A Heat-scar Named Desire


Where on earth is my "play on words" taking me with this one?

I remember so well those taunting words.

"They told me to take a streetcar named Desire and then transfer to one called Cemeteries and ride six blocks and get off at Elysian Fields."

New Orleans, Streetcars, Marlon Brando, Vivien Leigh and a film steeped in controversy and symbolism.

What, you may be ask, does the Tennessee Williams screenplay of "A Streetcar Named Desire" have to do with lifetime relationships?

I'm glad you asked. The answer may surprise you.

When the character, Blanche, made the above statement, although full of symbolism, her message was clear.

She had been on the "desire" streetcar long before ever arriving in New Orleans, and it had only taken her to a life of bewilderment and death (Cemeteries). Elysian Fields was the supposed place of "paradise" she so longingly sought. As the movie progresses, you soon discover that where this streetcar had taken her was anything but paradise.

Sound familiar?

Have you ever been on a streetcar like this?

Are you on it now?

Think about it!

The fires of passion and sex burn hot in the world around us. Chasing desire seems to be a common theme in the world today. Music videos, the Internet, TV shows, movies, magazines and books often have one common theme, the feeding of desire.

We have made sex more about recreation than relationship, and heat-scars abound as more and more get caught in the web of deception that chasing desire creates.

What, you may be wondering, is a "Heat-scar"?

* Children disillusioned by parental infidelity - Heat-scar!

* Teenagers and College students buying into the craze of "Girls Gone Wild" actions being where body dignity is found - Heat-scar!

* The lonely and heart-broken housewife struggling to find intimacy and measure up to the blonde bombshells of her husband's pornography enthusiasm and addiction - Heat-scar!

* Women struggling to be valued by our culture as more than sex objects - Heat-scar!

* Men struggling so much with the strongholds of lust and desire that they can't walk by a display of magazines without feeling the tug - Heat-scar!

And then along comes someone like me stating, "It is better to be wanted for a lifetime of nights and not just a night of a lifetime." Along comes someone like me extolling value in the marriage union. Along comes someone like me with a message that "turning-on" may be elevated over and over again in the world around us, but "tuning-in" is where it is really at.

"Tuning-in" to the longing of the human heart for intimacy.

"Tuning-in" to the longing of the heart for companionship.

"Tuning-in" to the longing of the heart for love, acceptance, compatibility and oneness.

This is why I often say that a suggestive music video may awaken desire, but it does nothing to satisfy the cry of the heart for intimacy, love, acceptance, compatibility and oneness.

How about you? Is your focus in life and relationships more about "Turning-on" or "Tuning-in"?

Your answer may determine if you, too, are in danger of being burned by "A Heat-scar Named Desire."

(C)Copyright 2005 advice-for-lifetime-relationships by Stanley J. LeffewALL RIGHTS RESERVED!

Stanley J. Leffew is the Author of, "How To Be Wanted For a Lifetime of Nights and Not Just a Night of a Lifetime". His website is based on this same theme. Find out for yourself why leading-with-the-body in life and relationships feeds desire but fails to satisfy the longing of the heart for love, companionship and intimacy by visiting http://advice-for-lifetime-relationships.com.


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